What’s in a word?

One of the most common questions that comes up when working with parents, partners, or families is “what does XX mean?” The language and terminology used within the LGBTQ+ community is constantly evolving. I consider this a good thing because it means there is flexibility for when we learn new things. To reduce confusion and create a basis for common understanding, here are frequently used terms and definitions found within the LGBTQ+ community. Please note these definitions are a reflection of the time when this was written and they may change over time. This list does not include every term to cover every identity and there are nuances to many terms. The list is in no particular order.

Sex – a combination of genitals, chromosomes, and hormones

Gender Identity – an individual’s innate or deep-seated sense of their gender

Sexual Orientation – an individual’s sexual, emotional, physical, and psychological attraction to other people

Gender Expression – the external appearance or presentation of a person’s gender identity; frequently this is expressed through behavior, clothing, voice, etc. which does not always conform to socially defined behaviors & characteristics with masculine or feminine.

Transgender – describes a person whose sex does not align or are incongruent with their gender identity; frequently used as an umbrella term when a person’s gender identity and/or expression does not align with cultural expectations.

Cisgender – describes a person whose sex and gender identity does align or are congruent with each other; the prefix “cis” comes from the Latin meaning “on this side of” and is used in various scientific terms.

Intersex – individuals born with any variety of situations when reproductive and/or sexual anatomy doesn’t fit into expectations of “male” or “female.” There are over 30 different variations.

Queer – previously used as a slur, younger generations have reclaimed this word as the ultimate umbrella term. It can be used in different contexts but in its reclamation has been used to cover anyone within the LGBTQ+ community. Please be mindful that due to its use as a slur, not everyone within the LGBTQ+ community uses this term.

Lesbian – a woman who is attracted to other women

Gay – a man who is attracted to other men

Bisexual – an individual who is attracted to more than one gender

Pansexual – an individual with attraction towards people of all genders, regardless of their sex or gender identity.

Asexual – an individual who does not experience sexual attraction to others

It is important to note sexual orientation and gender identity are two completely separate concepts. Someone can be cisgender (sex and gender align) and bisexual (attracted to more than one gender.) Another person can be transgender (sex and gender do not align) and heterosexual (attracted to the opposite sex.)